That’s it, I’m going to rip the phone out. Anybody who wants to get in touch will just have to use telepathy. Rip the phone out and shove a stake where its cord used to be, perhaps smear it with garlic, too.
The “Computer Maintenance Department” has been blissfully absent from my life for probably over a week now, so I HAD to get some new moron telling me that the Australian Government was going to “give me $5,230 dollars because my bank was involved in some unlawful transactions and this is my hard-earned money.” PISS OFF! Where do they come up with these ideas? No, wait. I don’t want to know. Sod the war on terrorism, I want to see a war on telemarketers. It’s not even telemarketing, is sodding Telescammers. Anyone got some missiles handy? A few of those Navy Seals wouldn’t go amiss letting rip in one of those call centres. But reserve the main torture for the ring-leaders: the ones who think these things up. Nothing is too good. Dust off your Inquisition books. Learn and apply.